FW: FWD-labels

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Quite amusing. The comments are a nice touch.


       In case you need further proof that the human race is doomed 
 through
       stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer 
 goods:
       
       On Sears hairdryer:
       Do not use while sleeping.
       (Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)
       
       On a bag of Fritos:
       You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
       (The shoplifter special!)
       
       On a bar of Dial soap:
       Directions: Use like regular soap.
       (and that would be how?)
       
       On some Swann frozen dinners:
       Serving suggestion: Defrost.
       (But it's *just* a suggestion!)
       
       On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert:(printed on bottom of the box) Do 
 not
       turn upside down.
       (Too late! You lose!)
       
       On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
       Product will be hot after heating.
       (Are you sure??? Let's experiment.)
       
       On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
       Do not iron clothes on body.
       (But wouldn't that save more time?)
       
       On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
       Do not drive car or operate machinery.
       (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents 
 if we
        just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)
       
       On Nytol sleep aid:
       Warning: may cause drowsiness.
        (One would hope!)
       
       On a Korean kitchen knife:
       Warning keep out of children.
       (Or pets! What's for dinner?)
       
       On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights:
        For indoor or outdoor use only.
        (As opposed to use in outer space?)
       
       On a Japanese food processor:
       Not to be used for the other use.
       (Now I'm curious.)
       
       On Sainsbury's peanuts:
       Warning: contains nuts.
        (Really???)
       
       On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
       Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
       (I'm glad they cleared that up...)
       
       On a Swedish chainsaw:
       Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.
       (What is this, a home castration kit?)
       
       On a child's superman costume:
       Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
       (That's right, destroy a universal childhood fantasy!)
   
  
  
  
  
  
 
 
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